Monday, July 24, 2006

What is it with people in shops. More so the customers after they get their change. Why must they fumble about with the change and the reciept like a chimp whos got a shiny new toy. Just yesterday, a crisis struck in the house. No milk and no diluting orange (Im off the fizzy stuff, well trying to). I battled with motorists to get to the shop, endured toenail melting heat and managed to pick up the bread and the orange quicker than George Michael got caught fumbling around with that 58 year old van driver. Yet I had to stand behind some fecker who spent more time rooting around in his wallet trying to find the money to pay for whatever he was buying. He spent even more time rooting around, making room to put the change back in. But why do it at the counter, and why hold me up in the process. There should be signs up in shops stating "Please step away from the counter as soon as you get your change. No loitering!!!!" I spent more time standing around behind this guy than wandering around the shop and driving up there. If you have to root around in your wallet, things are probably tough, I know. I root more than a tree, but at least I do it in a comfortable, quiet, private place. Not in front of the fecking counter!!!!!!

It was nice to have a night off last night, particualry after spending the last 2 weeks in bed. Well actually it wasnt. Got to see the second last episode of the the current series of Top Gear and that was about it. I decided to take the new car for a spin and spent the next 2 hours trying to find a loud rattle. Was it the bones of some small animal I rolled over? Was it someone in the boot? Was it one of the corpus christi crew casting a spell? Either way it was none of the above, and I couldnt figure it out. This got the blood boiling, but soon had to came down as I didnt want to be paying any more visits to the South Infirmary. Same thing again this morning. Maybe it was the 10 hours sleep I got last night, but I figured out that my sunglasses were loose in the sunglasses holder. Why it sounded like something in the glove box will go down as one of the many of histories amazing mysteries.

According to some website, that I cant be bothered cutting and pasting there is 73% humidity in Cork today. This feels accurate enough for my liking. While theres no toenail melting sunshine, the humidity is worse as far as Im concerned. Im stuck here in boxer shorts and a t-shirt contemplating sitting in the fridge for an hour. While the sunshine puts most of us in a good mood, the humidity is enough for me to go back to South Infirmary. I cant stand it! I know it could be worse, we could be living in France and be terrified of dying from the heat. 23 people dead so far, and the French Government are saying it they wont allow thousands to die like it did in 2003. If I were in France right now, Id be after robbing a big Air Con unit, and like He-Man, battle off the heat wave with a big Air Con machine.

Anyway thats enough of my moaning, Im off to find BattleCat!